letters from north america

Ok, well first of all a hya to everyone back home that reads this thing. As most of you know I am out in canada for the first term of uni this year. If yopu didnt know that well yeah sorry I may have forgot to tell you.

Well I have been out here nearly 2 months now and have decided to put pen to paper, (or the electronicy equilivilant) Describing things happening and just the randomness of a Brit in the colonies.

First a message stating the obvious. It is bloody cold out here I swear to the gods we had SNOW not piddly little uk snow but full on crisp thick white snow like in crimbo films at the start of October.

I mean how the hell am I expected to survive in a country where mnus ten is shorts weather. Oh and smokers just just don't its cold and drops so far below freezing that if you throw a cup of water out side off the dorm first floor balcony by november it will freeze before it hits the ground.

Everyone I have met out here has been really friendly everyone is really open and well nice iI suppose. Although I can only speak for the province of Saskatchewan as my visit to Toronto was 45 minutes high speed through airport security and immigration. Woot I didnt get cavity searched and the border people were polite and friendly. Heathrow take note.

Some general things I have learned:

1. thermals are a must.
2. visa debit cards do not work in most atms but work in credit card readers.
3. booze is expensive, seriously the liquor stores are government run or private off licenses open late with huge markups. I mean 12 coke can cans of bud light lime was £11.50.
4. as Kevin wilson says. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8sxk4xNnxw Seriously don't. I was singing along to a Lilly allen song and said that line and everyone was horrified.
5. french jokes are very popular.
6. canadian football is like a religion out here.
7. you need walking boots to get round the cities here. I swear to god you need to rent a car or make a friend with a car.
8. and even if you have a tame accent at home you will have to translate the slang we use.
9. Monty python is huge over here, which makes it fun to be British.
10. yes they do end every sentence with eh eh!

Its great out here and well worth the trip even doing stuff same as at home like gaming and watching telly is so different in some ways but the same in others.
Oh and before i forget yes mounties do wear that uniform all the time.

If you follow me out here remeber one thing above all else, Drink Canada Dry is a marketing slogan not a challenge.

A question?

Why exactly do I bother owning a bed?

I mean when I have essays I do not sleep, when I am socializing I do not sleep. When I am in my room I do not sleep.

I may as well be dammed and buy a sofa instead. As for the room well consistent hot water would be nice.

Oh well. Also Why do I buy gifts for newly created holidays such as valentines or mothers day?

At least I am eating healthily now, well minus the pizza, the coffee, the gin, the beer and the chocolate.

Why am I here blogging at 2:23am ?

These are all questions that worry me as I sit counting electric sheep.

sleep. What is it? What does it look like?

I have come to the conclusion that university takes normal teenagers who stay up late and turns them into insomniac dribbling wrecks who survive due to the replacement of blood by pure caffine.

When I realised that I can by first taste, tell the difference betwween Red Bull, Boost Kick and Relentless. I decided that I am not a healthy man. Is the human body designed to cope with that much Taurine?

When your morning repast consists of your morning medication, mouthwash and a half can of the energy drink from the evening before. You cannot in all truth answer yes to the Parental Units questions of 'are you eating ok?' without some shred of guilt. Well it would be guilt if I was not too tired to care.

It as a copnsequence can make me somewhat well ratty if I am honest. I tend to behave slightly irrationally. This however does not explain the insomnia or why on earth that my sedatives contain the side effects warning that they may cause said illness.

Hello, Good Morning, Good Evening and Good Night.

Well welcome to the blog. Even though for many years I have had such utter disdain for the blasted things that I feel that to paraphrase a great man 'never before has so little been said by so many and read by so few.' Well anyway, I read a couple of blogs that shine like diamonds in the rough. I felt I may as well add to the bandwidth as some of my experiences are just too unbelievable to count.

From 5 A.M drum solos using the radiator outside my door to walking into the kitchen past a bath containing, 3 girls a duvet and a portable TV. It's a strange place, my block at uni. I live with a group of people that never fail to suprise me.

All of the names in every extract following this will be changed to protect the incomp no no sorry the innocent. (well possibly both)
They brighten my day, usually make me feel better about myself and sometimes I learn from them.

Till then Campers I shall leave you with a song by a band that make me chuckle, read the books and then listen again.

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=CReo1d7JEj8